I recently had a conversation with my dad about whether or not you can truly love someone else without really loving yourself first.
We came to the understanding that professing love and practicing love are two very different arts.
While it can be easy to tell someone that we love them (and even this is hard for some people), how we actually treat them can paint another picture altogether.
In my own time spent with the opposite feelings of self-love such as self-pity, self-defeat, and self-loathing, I’ve learned that professing and practicing self-love is an integral part of how well we can show love to others – especially those closest to us.
I’ve found that it’s so much easier to blame and externalize our own negative feelings than to look inside our own heart and see that the issue stems from not showing love to ourselves.
Luckily, I’ve been quite self-aware through this entire process and have discovered two simple self-love habits that can help us be greater lovers all around!
LOVING ‘US’ FIRST
Be your own best friend…
Have you ever done something that completely sucked away any feelings of self-worth?
I have, and I seem to become my own worst enemy.
Instead of simply accepting a situation, I’ll pick it apart and rip it to shreds until I’ve played out enough scenarios of what I “should” have done/said.
Becoming our own best friend means having patience, compassion, and understanding for who we are at our core being and allowing ourselves to learn from all experiences, even the shitty ones.
After all, we wouldn’t treat our best friend so poorly would we?
Self-love tip #1 – Journaling:
Opt for some free flowing journal writing when you feel these low vibration feelings come up. Chances are you probably won’t write the same sentence out 100 times, yet odds are that the same vicious thoughts will keep replaying in your head, over and over. Writing can help you release these negative thoughts while simultaneously creating a constructive layout of the situation.
Learn to say “I Love You” – to YOU…
I can’t remember the last time I looked at myself in the mirror and said “Sandra, I love you.” I mean this whole idea seems like a silly practice.
But why don’t we do this? How would our self-worth change if we took the time to profess love to ourselves as a simple daily habit?
It may be uncomfortable at first to stare in our own eyes and speak such profound words – ok, it’s definitely a little odd, BUT learning to be open with ourselves is a great starting point for being more open with others.
Self-love tip #2 – Morning Mirror Ritual:
When you get in front of the mirror after waking up, look into your own eyes and say “I LOVE YOU” (like you mean it). I know it sounds crazy but over time having this simple self-love quickie with yourself will start to change your subconscious tapes into something much more positive and loving!
Remember – we can’t give away something we don’t have…
This concept is simple. If we don’t have something ourselves we certainly cannot give any of this thing we don’t have, to anyone else.
Demonstrating compassion, kindness, and a generous heart to ourselves during our worst of times is the best way to build up more self-love.
So today and every day, practice loving yourself and learn to love the world! Click to Tweet!